So tell me...
Why does being the available one make you so unattractive to the one you wish to obtain? I read an article over coffee this morning that really put some stangeness into perspective for me. When someone is too available its a turn off. Which to an extent I understand, it takes away from chase and need to catch the other. We have this inner need for things we can't have and the spark gets lost when we get it. But why? I had a conversation with a coworker the other day regarding the vicious circle that happens when you are interested in someone that seems to make things just too damn complicated. The worst though, is when you take a step back and think, this person I wish to obtain is unavailable you sit and curse yourself for being so available. So in an attempt to make yourself more unavailable in hopes to win said person over, you neglect to realize that the person who is worth your time and available is now looking at you the same way you look at the person you can't have.
The downfall of all the back and forth wishy washiness is what happens when you are no longer down to play games and you just want someone to genuinely want you back? Why does it seem so hard in this day and age to just be with someone? I like a chase, I like a challenge, but I don't like impossible. People have a bad habit of making themselves so unavailable that they in turn end up lonely. I've been on both sides of the fence, the wantee and the wanter. Neither side is necessarily easy, but I can tell you, being the giver of the want and not being acknowledged is pretty damaging to ones self esteem. Which plays another huge part in this whole game we call dating. Too often I feel the ones who wish for the attention they give end up with a depleted sense of worth because despite their efforts, it goes unnoticed. I think we all need to take a step back and reevaluate the type of person we are and the type of person we wish to be. And then realize that being unavailable is quickly becoming a thing that just hurts feelings and pushes away potential happiness. Never be too wrapped up in playing hard to get, you end up alone.
I think I am learning that it doesn't matter how much or little effort you put into something, when the right person comes along, all of that wont matter. It wont be games, it will just be two people head over heels for each other.