writing amnesia

I've got a case of writing amnesia.

It’s funny because so many people, over the last year of not knowing who stands before me in the fingerprint pained mirror build into my bathroom door, tell me to just write through the rut. But how can you write through something when you don’t have have a voice and when words don’t even look like words anymore. When the very things that made Kierstin, a writer, have become foreign objects in my hands.  

Read More

A Walk Through Grieving You

Grief is like walking through a dark room you've been in before but it's all different. It's confusing, unfamiliar, jutting out in different directions at unexpected times. In unexpected ways. I'm not sure how long I'll stay in the dark. Could be days, weeks, months. But I know that somewhere in the dark is the key to turning on the light. You always told me I am the key to my own success. So maybe the key to turning on the light will be found in the heart that's still healing from a loss so great.

Read More

Mind over Matter and Maple Leaves

There is a leaf that sits upon my arm, and I frequently get asked if I am in fact Canadian. When the response is, "no, I am not." I get a slew of other comments regarding the tattoo. Well, here I am to clear everything up for you curious beings.

When my world comes to a halt, usually every year around September, I look down at my leaf and remember that it is just a season. That even when I thought I would never move through it, I did. It is my reminder to hold on and keep going. That the darkness, although unbelievably consuming at times, is only temporary. 

Read More

reflections in the hazy morning light

This morning I got up and walked into the bathroom. I turned on the light and stood at the sink. I stared at myself and wondered, "how did I let it get this way?" Aside from looking worn out, I look sick. Sick of life, sick of unhappiness. Sick of people asking why I'm losing weight and why I'm always tired. I looked at my reflection in the hazy light of morning and decided I need to change.

Read More